Saturday, December 3, 2016

On the Third Day of TiZmas

On the Third DaY of TiZmas, TiZ reveals to you...

I was bullied terribly as a child and early teen.

I might have deserved it.

I was (and remain) weird.

Friday, December 2, 2016

On the Second DaY of TiZmas

On the Second DaY of TiZmas, TiZ reveals to you...

I cannot STAND a bully.

This bears repeating--I cannot STAND a bully.

Thursday, December 1, 2016

On the First Day of TiZmas


On the First Day of TiZmas, TiZ reveals to you...

This is the first time I've allowed politics on my Facebook feed.

Wednesday, November 23, 2016

Happy Thanksgiving and Collateral Beauty Thought


A friend gave this to me the night before the election. It took me two weeks to read...

YOU WERE MADE FOR THIS
By Clarissa Pinkola Estes

My friends, do not lose heart.  We were made for these times. I have heard from so many recently who are deeply and properly bewildered. They are concerned about the state of affairs in our world now. Ours is a time of almost daily astonishment and often righteous rage over the latest degradations of what matters most to civilized, visionary people.

You are right in your assessments.  The luster and hubris some have aspired to while endorsing acts so heinous against children, elders, everyday people, the poor, the unguarded, the helpless, is breathtaking. Yet, I urge you, ask you, gentle you, to please not spend your spirit dry by bewailing these difficult times. Especially do not lose hope. Most particularly because, the fact is that we were made for these times. Yes. For years, we have been learning, practicing, been in training for and just waiting to meet on this exact plain of engagement.

I grew up on the Great Lakes and recognize a seaworthy vessel when I see one. Regarding awakened souls, there have never been more able vessels in the waters than there are right now across the world. And they are fully provisioned and able to signal one another as never before in the history of humankind.

Look out over the prow; there are millions of boats of righteous souls on the waters with you. Even though your veneers may shiver from every wave in this stormy roil, I assure you that the long timbers composing your prow and rudder come from a greater forest. That long-grained lumber is known to withstand storms, to hold together, to hold its own, and to advance regardless.

In any dark time, there is a tendency to veer toward fainting over how much is wrong or untended in the world. Do not focus on that. There is a tendency, too, to fall into being weakened by dwelling on what is outside your reach, by what cannot yet be. Do not focus there. That is spending the wind without raising the sails.

We are needed, that is all we can know. And though we meet resistance, we more so will meet great souls who will hail us, love us and guide us, and we will know them when they appear. Didn't you say you were a believer? Didn't you say you pledged to listen to a voice greater? Didn't you ask for grace? Don't you remember that to be in grace means to submit to the voice greater?

Ours is not the task of fixing the entire world all at once, but of stretching out to mend the part of the world that is within our reach. Any small, calm things that one soul can do to help another soul, to assist some portion of this poor suffering world, will help immensely. It is not  given to us to know which acts, or by whom, will cause the critical mass to tip toward an enduring good.

What is needed for dramatic change is an accumulation of acts, adding, adding to, adding more, continuing. We know that it does not take everyone on Earth to bring justice and peace, but only a small, determined group who will not give up during the first, second or hundredth gale.

One of the most calming and powerful actions you can do to intervene in a stormy world is to stand up and show your soul. Soul on deck shines like gold in dark times. The light of the soul throws sparks, can send up flares, builds signal fires, causes proper matters to catch fire, To display the lantern of soul in shadowy times like these--to be fierce and to show mercy towards others; both are acts of immense bravery and greatest necessity.

Struggling souls catch light from other souls who are fully lit and willing to show it. If you would help to calm the tumult, this is one of the strongest things you can do.

There will always be times when you feel discouraged. I too have felt despair many times in my life, but I do not keep a chair for it. I will not entertain it. It is not allowed to eat from my plate.

The reason is this: In my uttermost bones I know something, as do you. It is that there can be no despair when you remember why you came to Earth, who you serve, and who sent you here. The good words we say and the good deeds we do are not ours. They are the words and deeds of the One who brought us here. In that spirit, I hope you will write this on your wall: 

When a great ship is in harbor and moored, it is safe, there can be no doubt.  But that is not what great ships are built for.

###############################


#CollateralBeauty Happy Thanksgiving

Friday, September 16, 2016

THE SWEETEST THING



I came upon a young man today at around 6 pm, quite close to my home on Fort Tryon Park.  He was a little under his car and I thought in my granny way, "Oh no! Car troubles? Maybe I can help that nice young man."

And then I saw that he had a mat.  And I thought in my Judgina Navritilova way, "Very well prepared.  Good on you, young man."

And then I saw that his shoes were off.  And I thought in my Tizzy way, "What the what?"

The "what" was he was praying--a Muslim praying.

Engaging in the Maghrib prayer...a little early which is allowed if there are some time issues.  Which there would be if you're driving through the city looking for a safe place to pray.  

Or he could be from another tradition. From what I understand, if he's Sunni, he's there for a loooooong time.

No matter...it was lovely and it was peaceful and I was honored he felt my little Russian, Jewish, Dominican, canine hood felt safe.

I almost went to fetch him water.  I did mainline 4 seasons of "Homeland" in 2 1/2 weeks.  I know how this is done.

And then I saw a bottle by his side.

JN repeated, "Very well prepared.  Good on you, young man."


PS Now I know where east is.


Thursday, September 15, 2016

BIO 101 (and I don't mean dissecting a frog)


For the newbie to theater world, actors always have to submit a biography for a Playbill when they do a skit.  When you're in the ensemble (or for readings and such) it is 50 words max.  For me, 25 years of career in 50 words? In a word...well...there is no word. But there are 50. Wow!

I'm doing a reading this week.  Lovely piece called MARRY HARRY at the York.  Really sweet and off. This is the bio I whipped together this morning. Again, 25 years in 50 words.



Christianne Tisdale – Broadway/West End: Original Cast Les Miserables (25th Anniversary), On a Clear Day, Titanic (1st Nat’l), Triumph of Love and One Touch of Venus; Belle in Beauty and the Beast. TV/Film: “30 Rock”; “Law and Order, CI”; “Wallflowers” (producer); “A Tale of Cinderella.” Published author. IG @baxandthecity. www.ChristianneTisdale.com


You now know I've done some shizz. It's the important stuff...or at least the stuff that the cogniscenti would find important.  And it's almost written in code. Thus, you don't know that I eventually got the role of Madam T in Les Shiz for a short period of time. Or that my mom died during rehearsals for Clear Day. Or that I was fired from one of these skits (ssshhhhh).  Or that Kristen Wiig was my scene and improv partner on "30 Rock." Or that I almost passed out making yellow tutus for a "Wallflowers" shoot because ours were lost in China somewhere.  

The yummy stuff. The bone and sinew. The breath. The life.

You might get that my stupid ass delicious delightful dog is important to me. But that's it.

And then I thought to meself, "Meself, what would happen if you bio-ed what you really wanted? What if you biograph-ed what was true?"

Honestly, why does an audience need to know what I've done before? Shouldn't they just get lost in what I'm doing in the moment? If there is a need for judgment, shouldn't the gavel come down on the crimes against acting I've just committed as opposed to the "good works" I've done before? Or petty crimes?

This is what an honest 50 word bio would look like for me.

Christianne Tisdale thinks she can act. And sing. She knows she can't dance, don't ask her. Unsure how she got into this, she's sticking with it 'til she's the last actor standing. TiZ has done some really good stuff. And some really bad stuff. Let's hope this is the former.

Yes?

PS  I've had the same agents for 25 years. Only agents I've ever known. They are Harden-Curtis and I love them very much. Hell will have to freeze over before we consciously uncouple.

PPS Champagne is delicious.




Sunday, September 11, 2016

Thursday, December 31, 2015

On the 31st DaY of TiZmas


On the 31st DaY of TiZmas, TiZ reveals to you...

31 grabs or take-alongs for 2016... (TiZzed over a nice bottle of Roederer)


Peace on Earth, Goodwill to Men

Work to be proud of

Righteous and rightful business

Charity

Honor

Shekels

Health

Music

Studio time

Fiction (in book form not life)

Friendship

Love

Matching wit 

Softball

Being art of the solution not the problem

Dharma

TV and film jobs

Content

Beautiful homesteading

Dog park

Healthy and happy puppy

Family

Adaptability

Curiosity

Dance

Ever more fulfilling and exciting stage work

Champagne

Beautiful and comfortable shoes

Creativity

Joy to the World








Wednesday, December 30, 2015

On the 30th DaY of TiZmas


On the 30th DaY of TiZmas, TiZ reveals to you...

The only 30 words I could put together.


You died.  I needed the how -- childishly thinking, "maybe I could fix it."  I can't.  Never could.  In a world that needs more you, the loss of you is dumbfounding.

Tuesday, December 29, 2015

On the 29th DaY of TiZmas


On the 29th DaY of TiZmas, TiZ reveals to you...

Twenty-nine "leave behinds" for 2016



Processed sugar (I did okay for a couple of months and then fucked it all up)

Regret (see above parenthetical phrase)

The need to prove myself

Perfectionism

Hiding

Feebleness of health

More TaB

Comfort spending

Waste

Making things better for those who have the wherewithal to do it for themselves but are lazy

Five more pounds of fat (I kept 7 pounds off from last year...wanna up the ante)

Lovely little sociopaths

Mess

TaBsicles (they form in the freezer when a can explodes)


Difficulty breathing

Screlting

Salad bars

PT

Fear of lack

Listening to utter bullshit and not saying anything

Listening to utter bullshit and not walking away

Sick puppy (his eyes are almost better...ALMOST)

Turning away

Bare walls

Broken iPhones

Bullies

Unmade beds

Throwing away my shot

Dancing to another's tune





Monday, December 28, 2015

On the 28th DaY of TiZmas


On the 28th DaY of TiZmas, TiZ reveals to you (while listening to the cast album of HAMILTON purchased on Google play for $1.99)...

28 things of darling NanaPop's that I proudly have in my possession ...

Whimsy

Their bedroom set (yup...conceived on that bed frame)

A set of leather luggage

A need for color

My mother's writing desk

A badger bristle shaving brush (Nana's first Christmas present to Pop)

Antique books (including A Complete Works of Shakespeare from 1878)

An interest in knowledge (and the trappings thereof)

Their first wedding rings

Three pieces of jewelry beautifully designed by Pop

My great grandfather's cane

Nana's last pretty party shoes

My grandma's hope chest

Pop's godmother's husband's ukeline

The same guy's brass pint from the Crown and Greyhound in Dulwich

A very drunk pic of the two of them

Nana's furs (with her name exquisitely sewn in)

The first set of pearls Pop ever gave her

An ancient oak dresser from Nanticoke

The shell from Pop's 21 gun salute

Hankies...some practical...some gorgeous

Great respect for a job well done and equal disdain for the lack

Stuffed dolls that may be politically incorrect so they mostly stay hidden (though sometimes they come out to ask "WTF?")

A beautiful watch we're pretty sure my Pappy stole that Pop and I lovingly restored for Nana

The importance of family

Their wedding china

An ancient cutting board (I'm probably giving myself food poisoning daily)

A deep adoration for the canine varietal





Sunday, December 27, 2015

On the 27th DaY of TiZmas


On the 27th DaY of TiZmas, TiZ reveals to you...

27 things BaXter is feeling at this very moment about his headwear...

Fuck this cone.
This cone sucks.
Take this cone and shove it.
I hate cones.
Take no cones.
I scream cone.
Cones of cream, not cones of shame.
It's been 8 weeks since I could clean my schmeckel. Oh the humanity.
This cone can suck my dick.
Cone head.
I cone from the South of France.
How many cones does it take to...
Cones are not a turn on.
Cones are to dogs what giant gold jewelry is to guys.
Con't.
Take my cone, please.
Why don't you cone up and see my some time.
Bubble dog.
When MyHuman totes me in the carrier, I look like an old timey gramophone.
I'm a Cone-o-phone.
I'm a Coning linguist.
I'm a Cone-a-dor.
Cone si, cone ca
This is NOT a party hat.
You never truly know someone until you've walked a mile in their cone.
If I ever get out of here, gonna give if all way.
CONE ON THE RUN!!!


Saturday, December 26, 2015

On the 26th DaY of TiZmas


On.the 26th DaY of TiZmas, TiZ reveals to you ...

26 words in an order that make sense to me...

Dear Tourists,

I know your presence helps pay my bills but it is time for you to go home now. Thank you so much. 

Love,
TiZ

Friday, December 25, 2015

On the Twenty-Fifth Day of TiZmas


My
Expressions
Ring
Round 
You

Cheering
Hurrah-ingly,
Raving
Inside,
Slyly,
Tizzily,
Manticore
And
Siren

Haroo
All
Penpals,
Prepare
Years-end

Now
Enter
World

Your
Endeavors
Aim
Rightly












Thursday, December 24, 2015

On the 24th DaY of TiZmas


On the 24th DaY of TiZmas, TiZ reveals to you...

24 things that WERE Christmas...*


Deadly homemade gifted peanut butter cups
Connecticut
Family
FaceTime
I SAW THREE SHIPS a la Jimmy Fallon and the Roots
Huge slabs of perfectly grilled beef with naught potatoes
Champagne
Dogs...here and past
Dog gifts
Gifts for warmth and sustenance
Breakfast casserole
Fierce games of Jenga
Bax's eyes healing
Kind commuters
Stuffing Ezekiel's stocking
Shirtsleeves
Ornaments and decorating an absconded Christmas tree
A no-spill sippy cup Holiday Omen
Friends
The Harry Simeone Chorale
Seeing an 8 year old friend star in The Nutcracker
A White Elephant Party where it felt appropriate to take candy from a baby (and I had to drag him       across the floor to do it).
Becoming Frodo (I bear the ring...the greatest gift of all)
Meeting 6 year old Justin on the subway who was Christmas Spirit personified...full of warmth and sharing all he had.  He took my breath away.

*Full disclosure - I wrote this after my Christmas night performance and pre-dated it for consistency.




Wednesday, December 23, 2015

On the 23rd DaY of TiZmas



On the 23rd DaY of TiZmas, TiZ reveals to you...

23 favorite Christmas songs

O Holy Night
I Saw Three Ships (Sting's version)
I Saw Three Ships (TiZ and JiM's version for Carols for a Cure)
Jesu Bambino
Rise Up, Shepherds and Follow
Go Tell It on the Mountain
Soul Cake
Stille Nacht
Lully Lullay
I Heard the Bells on Christmas Day
Tomorrow Shall Be My Dancing Day
Vince Guaraldi A Charlie Brown Christmas (really anything)
If It Doesn't Snow on Christmas
Dominick the Donkey
I'll Be Home For Christmas
Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas
Jingle Bells
The Christmas Shoes (NOOOOOOOO>>>I"M LYING>>>but it's a good reason to throw things)
Welcome Christmas
Ding Dong Merrily On High
Er is een Kindeke
White Christmas
Balulalow

Tuesday, December 22, 2015

On the 22nd DaY of TiZmas


On the 22nd DaY of BaXmas, BaX barks up for you...

I'm baaaaaaaaaaark...


My name was MaX with my other family

Because there were so many Maxes at the Humane Society when I went in, the FrontDeskHuman named me BaXter

After ANCHORMAN

They told MyHuman she could rename me AGAIN but she figured I had been through enough

MyHuman's human puppies often ask if they can punt me off a bridge or ask me how the wheel of cheese was and are surprised when I speak Spanish

I don't speak Spanish

I am racist

MyHuman is mortified by this

I'm also sizeist

MyHuman understands this

I miss the chaise longues that I could bounce on and fly over

However the couch from Fantine's dressing room has a nice high back where I can perch and mush the cushion and keep watch over all

Sometimes MyHuman accidentally leaves the bathroom door ajar

Sometimes I dine on everything from the garbage can

Q tips are a delicacy

Q tips makes my poo look like braids

Sometimes when MyHuman accidentally leaves the bathroom door ajar I accidentally lock myself in

To get back at the universe for being so unfair I shred the toilet paper roll

MyHuman doesn't seem to like any of this...AT ALL

If someone rings our bell or buzzer I answer back loud and long...after all they are far away...maybe 6 floors down or even through the door

If anyone answers I don't know because MyHuman kisses me and puts me in the bedroom where I yell and yell til she lets me out.  By then the bell buzzer is gone but I try to chase them through the door anyway

Like MyHuman, I never get hoarse




Monday, December 21, 2015

On the 21st DaY of TiZmas


On the 21st DaY of TiZmas, TiZ reveals to you...

Woof...it's me, BAXTER!!!!! Here are 21 of my things...MY THINGS...in no specific order or specification...just things about ME!!! Because MyHuman has taken to talking about her junk drawer and I'm woofing tired of it.

I love to poo

I love to eat poo

I love to try and kiss MyHuman after I've eaten poo so she can share in the joy

She is very generous and leaves all that joy to me

I love LambChop

I love Baby LambChop

I will never be fooled by Counterfeit LambChop

I like to pull all the stuffing out of my HumpBed

Since I don't eat it, MyHuman lets me do it and then very patiently restuffs it 

If the stuffing tasted like poo, I would definitely eat it

I have been in the cone of shame (or some version thereof) for 52 days

I am on my third antibiotic cream. There is enough steroid in this third cream to annihilate a small nation, and I hate it, but my eyes are feeling better and MyHuman no longer looks at me and makes bad faces

I hate the vet

They're really lucky MyHuman warns them of my hatred or they'd be minus some phalanges

The word phalanges makes me larf

I like it when MyHuman speaks to me in fake Japanese...makes me run around like an idiot

I like pretty girls

I especially like pretty girls with brown hair and big eyes

Since the cone of shame prevents me from cleaning my willy, MyHuman has taken to wiping it down with a warm, wet washcloth

She calls it my schmeckel and sings the schmeckel song

I like to hit MyHuman in the face with the cone of shame.  Hours of fun for everyone


I am quite well-woofed for a small dog, I think.  Please let MyHuman know if you would like to  hear more from me. #woof  And follow me on Instagram...BaxAndTheCity.

Sunday, December 20, 2015

On the 20th DaY of TiZmas



On the 20th DaY of TiZmas, TiZ reveals to you...

20 things I'm throwing out from junk drawer...

chinese takeout menus (I NEVER get delivery)

gum (ancient)


Epi Pen (pesky bees but it's time for a new one)


dog poop bag little fire hydrant carrier (without the dog poop bags)


Pet Check technology card (haven't used in three years and it was expensive but three years is long enough and the technology is probably old...as of 2 1/2 years ago)


NYSC regional passport (haven't been a member in two years and I DO know and they'd give me a new card anyway)


lint roller (1)


off-the-wall punch card (1) (1 punch...I shouldn't be going there anyway)


an ancient eraser from high school that i wrote TIZ on in pen


my Beauty and the Beast front of house name plaque


tip money ($9 in singles...to balance out what i owe the dogwalker

important business cards I'll never reference (50+)


a bag full of keys  (what are they for? I don't know.)

detritus

flotasam 

jetsam (honestly...I don't know what this shite is.)

coupons (past due and multiples)

some pills (vitamins? unknown specification and unknown origin and filthy...GAH!)

pencils (3...broken)

pens (2...all done run outta ink)











Saturday, December 19, 2015

On the 19th DaY of TiZmas


On the 19th DaY of TiZmas, TiZ reveals to you...

19 things that are in my junk drawer (obviously not EVERYTHING in my junk drawer)...


chinese takeout menus (I NEVER get delivery)

gum (ancient)

Epi Pen (pesky bees...it's not bee season so it's living here)

dog poop bag little fire hydrant carrier (without the dog poop bags)

Pet Check technology card (haven't used in three years but it was expensive so I'm saving it)

NYSC regional passport (haven't been a member in two years but you never know)

lint roller (2)

off-the-wall punch card (1) (1 punch)

an ancient eraser from high school that i wrote TIZ on in pen

my Beauty and the Beast front of house name plaque

tip money ($11 in singles)

kazoo

clothes pin (2)

wrench (to some Ikea product) (2)

Contingent Sea beverage cozy

NaNa's mass card (6)

Wood finish stain marker

important business cards I'll never reference (50+)

Baxter's first NYC dog license receipt

kazoo

eyeglass repair kit

billions of aa batteries

wite out
Blog Directory Web Directory Blogging Fusion Blog Directory