Controlly McViceGrip

I know I know. I have control issues. Maybe even control tissues since it's basically a muscular reaction at this point.

But I may have been outdid.

The last 2 months have just let me muttering (Okay, screaming), "Stop trying to control me." And this is not to directors. I LOVE direction. Sadly, most of my direction the past couple of years just includes the word "Don't." This must be because I am VERY creative.

Let me give a list of some of the strangest offenses...

1. Being given a line reading...in conversation.

2. Being told by an employer that they want me here early so I will be well-rested for the first day of rehearsal. Well...I'm being nice enough to come a day earlier and you obviously don't know this cast, 'cause we're gonna go out and get drunk.

3. Having a colleague say, "I run this rehearsal."

4. Having stickers on the back of company cars that ask, "How's my driving?" and include a phone number so any bored tea partier can call the insurance company and narc on you for "unsavory lane changes."

5. Being asked, "Who was driving the company car at noon yesterday?" and not being told why.

6. A colleague having to sign a release saying she would drive better (aka, no unsavory lane changes).*

7. A suggested group warm-up pre-show.

8. Having my clothing eyed and "fixed" by other than someone employed to do so.

9. Being called once a week for each claim (so 3x a week) by Worker's Comp to see if I still need medical treatment.

10. Being called to the office and never being told why.

And of course...All Things Pandermonium.

It's become cold sore central for me. Haven't had any blossom in nine months. Two in the past three weeks.

But it's a good lesson in what controlling tendencies can do to those around you (and my lips). I guess. I gave up caring three days ago and it's worked wonders on my disposition.

Can't you tell?

*This is weighing particularly heavy on my mind at the moment, as I cut someone off at a four-way stop traffic circle. He was directly opposite and turning left. I was turning right...into the same lane...BECAUSE HE DIDN'T HAVE HIS BLINKER ON. So, there I am smiling and curtsying with an "I'm so sorry" wave, because he can just dial up a number and say I did an unsavory turn WHEN IT WAS HIS FAULT. This is what I'm worrying about while I'm driving instead of DRIVING. I'm honestly thinking of driving around wearing a Nixon mask.