Meet Me in Saint Louis

St. Louis. Honestly? Not my fav town. I imploded during my stay at the Rep last fall when I heard that some local high school students declared it “Slap a Jew Day” and went at it. After the third Judische Kind had been walloped, the powers that be put a stop to it. The kids weren’t suspended or anything but given a “good talking to and a lesson in the Holocaust.”

What? So they could do it right the next time?

On top of this, Recent Widower Ex (a Rush Limbaugh lover…I swear to GOD I did not know this when we started. He actually HID this fact. I could NOT fix that.) is from the area. I completely own the fact that he turned me off of an entire state…and state of mind.

Soooo I had to give some thought when I was offered two jobs landing me in St. Louis for ten weeks. In the summer. Hot as Hades.

But since I hadn’t had legit theater work in EIGHT MONTHS (there’s no business like SLOW business), I didn’t ponder for tres long.

Here I am at the MUNY—the nation’s oldest, LARGEST outdoor theater. 12,000 people a night. During the nine show run of Annie I will perform for 108,000, playing the nicest, smartest girl in the music theater canon.

Oh BOY! Gol-LEE!

What were they thinking? The last thing I am is nice.

Oh, shut up…I ain’t dumb.

Now, HOW do you perform for 12,000 people? You MUNYize. Yes. A proper noun has been magically transformed into an active verb.

To MUNYize: 1. Speak clearly. 2. Make HUGE choices. 3. Move strongly and gesture when you speak. 4. Do not stand in profile. 5. Do not stand close to your little Annie (tough since you’re supposed to be nice and care for her). 6. Do NOT stand next to the boom (you blend in, dontcha know).

Twixt you and me, I don’t know what a boom is. But I sure as shit ain’t standing next to it.

Oh, and…

7. When there’s a kids’ group number, bring on 72 MUNY Kids to fill out the stage.

Which is what I experienced yesterday. 72 MUNY kids with 72 pails and 72 scrub brushes performing Hardknock Life.

72 kids meaning it…with all their hearts.

It did wonders in mending mine.

So, meet me in St. Louis, Louis. Hot as Hades, but it just might cure what’s been ailing you.