Saturday, May 15, 2010

SEALED WITH A CLICK - entry 24

Subject: log-on, log-off, linguistic loatheries

To: enhibrem@stepton.edu

From: Christinan@aol.com

Date: 06:23 PM 2/16/99

my alimonial alliterative alter-ego (alimonial is payback for the cruel missy t reference):

i.q. idiocy, fourth-grade foolery, and lots o’ lessons learned: never date anyone who asks you (don’t you love how i always make “you” the subject) your i.q. before they ask you out, because not only are they unfounded intellectual snobs, but if they need to ask a question like that, then they will continually be saying things like “slow down, you know your mind is too fast for a mere mortal like me.” boy, doesn’t that get old. so, to answer your question of 2/12/99, yes, my ex had something stupid to say about my being smart.

once upon a time, long ago and far away, christinane was paid not to sing . . . at 17 she worked as a singing waitress in a hell-hole called anderson’s angus corral (known fondly to its help as anderson’s anal canal), where a lovely gentleman would pay her $25 to sing “the sound of music.” one night, our songbird had a cold and must have performed “the sound of mucous,” because her solicitor paid her $50 to cease and desist.

a tale so chilling, to this day it must be told in 3rd person singular.

ooo (to e.e.ven the score, although i realize, considering my bogus brotherly blowjob background, that could be read another way)

me.e.

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