Tuesday, December 15, 2009

On the Fifteenth Day of Christ*&^%$

On the Fifteenth Day of Christ*&^%$, Tiz reveals to you...

Twice I have ruled the world. It felt good. I was a benevolent ruler.

I dislike benevolent bullies more than I dislike bullies…aka, passive aggression just plain pisses me off.

I have dated complete wankers just because I thought they were fabulously talented. That fascination fades quickly, I gotta tell you.

Saturday, all I ate was open-faced peanut butter and butter sandwiches because I got me a supplement that would aid my gluten intolerance. Sunday I woke up four pounds fatter.

I have two wisdom teeth that are positively pre-historic. I must have been born of the La Brea Tar Pits.

I hate L.A. with a passion.

I can spread my toes very wide and use them like prehensile fingers. I once succeeded in playing do re mi fa so in the key of c on the piano.

I’ve never tried Methylenedioxymethamphetamin but rumor has it I would like it very much.

I have finally reached a point in my life where I will walk out of or turn off a popular movie if it’s just not floating my boat.

I dated the most boring man on the face of the earth. I thought it would be nice. It was and it wasn't. Nice isn’t enough.

I don’t take antibiotics. They make me smell.

I was once this height and 98 pounds.

I put on 50 pounds at Yale.

I use my Goddess Kali lunch box as a purse. Love and war in my very own hands. Plus a peanut butter and butter sammich and some TaB.

I hate the Coca-Cola Company. They said “nyet” to The CoFfee TaBle BoOk. SoBs.

1 comment:

  1. Sometimes I come across as if I know everything. Perhaps it’s because I don’t know shit

    I’ve never been to California but Seattle is a lot of fun. A very accepting and odd place

    Ecstasy speeds you up and can cause a stroke as it raises your body temp. It’s the club drug and you’re right, you wouldn’t like it.

    I have pretty feet, still, but they’ve never played anything except footsies

    I have difficulty sitting still. Yesterday I threw my back out coughing and today I have to sit still.

    I will send out Christmas cards this year for the first time in years. It will probably be my uncles last.

    I enjoy bundling up and playing in the snow. Even if it is just to snow blow the driveway

    I find the beach a magical place. My mood improves just with the thought of going there.

    I’m going to take better care of myself this year. I’m an expert at taking care of others

    I still love my dogs….and Niki

    My Christmas gift giving is done. Now I can get back to random fun

    Gratitude is a state of mind that requires a daily conscious effort to maintain. I’m still learning that you only get to keep it by giving it away. Everything else is peanuts

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